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Border Patrol Seizes 50K Gallons of Contraband Maple Syrup Smuggled In Ford F-150 Gas Tanks
Border Patrol seizes 50,000 gallons of bootleg Canadian maple syrup smuggled in Ford F-150 gas tanks as US-Canada tariff war escalates.
Sep 10
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Analysts Agree Trial Would Have Wrapped Up In Ten Minutes If Defendant Were The Father
Legal Scholars Confirm Exhausting Lindsay Clancy Deliberations Would Have Wrapped Up in 4 Minutes If A Dad Blamed Lexapro.
Sep 10
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Cop Insists Placing Revolver On Refrigerator Met Child-Proofing Standards
Thai police captain insists placing loaded revolver on top of family refrigerator met highest child-proofing standards after school scare.
Sep 10
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Auntie Bids On Seized Hermès Bag To Store Her NTUC FairPrice Plastic Bags Inside
Singapore Auntie buys S$40,000 seized money-laundering Hermès Birkin bag at public auction solely to store 400 spare NTUC plastic bags.
Sep 9
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Indonesian Man Proposes To Girlfriend With 5kg Bag Of Premium Rice
Indonesian man ditches volatile gold and proposes to his girlfriend with a 5kg bag of premium rice as national inflation hits 3.19%
Sep 9
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Scammer Spends 3 Weeks Trying To Translate Victim’s Singlish Replies
Jurong man defeats video blackmail ring by relentlessly complaining in Singlish about caifan fish prices and his locked CPF retirement funds.
Sep 8
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
2
Expat Buys Fake Thai ID, Gets Drafted into Military Conscription Lottery
Expat skips 300-baht tourist fees with fake Thai ID, only to get drafted into military basic training 48 hours later in Chiang Mai.
Sep 8
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Nationwide Panic As Calendar Experts Confirm Next Public Holiday Is In December
Panic hits SCBD cubicles as calendar audit confirms zero public holidays until December, triggering surge in sick leave requests.
Sep 8
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
State Issues ‘How Not To Vote Like A Racist’ Coloring Books To Eastern Towns
Germany rolls out mandatory coloring books to teach eastern voters how to pick approved parties after shock AfD state election win.
Sep 7
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Kurdish MP’s Daughter Learns She Has 8,000 Fiancés Crossing The English Channel
Kurdish Leader's Daughter Clarifies She Is Single After Home Office Approves 8,400 Asylum Seekers Claiming They Are Secretly Engaged to Her.
Sep 7
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Cabinet Approves Fund To Translate Government White Papers Into Mancunian
No 10 North approves £500k fund to translate dry Whitehall legislation into Mancunian after civil servants panic over regional slang.
Sep 7
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
Jakarta Residents Report Ash Cloud Noticeable Improvement Over Regular City Air
Jakarta air quality hits all-natural high as thick Krakatau ash cloud replaces city's routine cocktail of diesel fumes and canal smog.
Sep 7
•
Leigh McKiernon
1
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